Trunk Diner

Burger reviewed: 175gram Fresh Ground Wagyu beef, grilled brioche, baby cos lettuce, thick cut tomato, house-made pickles, cheese and bacon.

Venue: Trunk Diner

Date: 9 March 2012

Ladies and gentlemen, we have a new clubhouse leader!

In a week that saw a well known Australian newspaper publish an article on Victoria's best burgers, the fellows now redundant, made their way to Trunk Diner for an absolute ball-tearer of a burger. Which somehow, did not make its way onto this well known newspapers list - seriously you put a cheeseburger from a milk bar out in the sticks, a place which is sure to end up as an insurance scam when it "accidentally' burns down, over a gastronomical experience in the CBD of the best city in Australia - that's right Sydney I said it.

As such, I am giving this little beauty the title of "The People's burger"!

Located on Exhibition Street, Trunk Diner is described as an "American style diner". When one hears this description, one thinks of barmaids dressed up in cheerleading uniforms and roller blades. Quite the contrary. We were greeted by a Vincent Chase look-a-like who was clearly hung over and quite proud that he was 30 minutes late for his shift.

The outdoor setting was very pleasant and a place where you feel right at home (as evidenced by the number of birds who had snapped one off on some of the tables).

Now to the burger. Trunk have played this well (unlike Gautam Gambhir and the short ball - seriously I haven't enjoyed watching a bloke go out this much since Darryl Cullinan last played) as they have gotten the basics down pat (unlike Scott Muller). The bun is light and soft, the patty is tasty and juicy and the salads are fresh. But Trunk are able to differentiate themselves in a number of simple ways.

The first is that they have taken the best parts of the two best burgers in town and combined them into a superburger - a cheeseburger with bacon if you will. They have taken the "construct your own" approach of Rockpool and combined it with the unbelievable sauces of Cafe Vue. As if there was any argument that smokey barbeque is the greatest condiment on the planet, I will go out on a limb and say the homemade smokey barbeque at Trunk is the balls! And being given a bottle of it to put on your burger and dunk your chips in is a huge win.

The second is the bacon. As eluded to earlier, everything is better with bacon. And the Miss Piggy at Trunk is cooked a lot longer than anywhere else giving it a slightly charred taste which is groin-grabbingly transcendent without tasting bitter or burnt.

Finally the homemade pickle. More playful than a proverbial at a Wiggles concert. The acidic pickle leaves the flavours of the burger mingling in your mouth in a seductive pas de deux.

My only gripe about this burger was that my patty was slightly more towards well done than medium but the other fellows did not seem to have this problem. Ah well, life is a box of chocolates Forrest.

And to the sporting analogy. Due to a number of complaints from our readership of the weekly burview being targeted more towards our male audience, I will be likening this week’s burger a few things that are a little more feminine.

1. This burger is a lot like Australian Diamonds stalwart Eloise Southby-Halbish. The burger was well complimented by bacon and the salads (for the purposes of this analogy we will call the bacon Shazza McMahon and the salads Natasha Chokljat). The burger can even be accompanied by a well known beer (this is in reference to ESH's romance with footballer Justin Blumfield). All in all, a burger that will go down as one of the better Melbourne has produced.

2. This burger is a lot like a Mimco clutch - great value, dependable, devoid of handbag clutter and goes well with a nice pair of boots (beer).

3. The movie Love Actually. Tasteful, consuming and enough Hugh Grant to satisfy your cravings.

That's about all I have got. Great value for money and very tasty - get on a Trunk burger right meow.

Burger Friday Rating: 43.25