NSHRY

Burger reviewed: NSHRY's Umami Burger

Venue: NSHRY

Date: 15/02/2013

Today's burger adventure saw the Fellow's of the Burger Friday head down to the beach front restaurant of NSHRY.

Now let me set one thing straight right off the bat - No, I do not know how to pronounce the name of this joint! This presented an obvious problem to us in that we had no idea what to say to the taxi driver when we got in the cab. Our attempt at pronouncing NSHRY sounded so ridiculous that the cabbie said "bless you" after we responded to him asking "where to?"

Now I know that 'difficulty of name pronunciation' is not a contributing factor in a burger experience but if I could take a point away for an annoying name, I honestly would.

But moving on from the name, the real highlight for this burger experience was the surroundings. The restaurant is set virtually on the sand of a nice stretch of beach, just behind the Albert Park Angling Club - I can't imagine this club is known for good sports fishing (fittingly, the trophy fish displayed on the front of the Angling Club's building was a moderate sized Snapper). We were also lucky enough to head there on a sunny Friday where you could have easily parked yourself for a few hours and smashed some beers. The venue itself is modern and well set out. The ceiling of the inside section has hundreds of wooden stakes hanging off it which made you feel like you were in an Indiana Jones movie (but not Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull - that was trash).

Another win was that the Beaconsfield Parade running track runs right next to NSHRY - prime eye candy territory. This was a fitting distraction from the eye broccoli that was strutting along the beach in speedo’s (kind of like Homer Simpson walking along the beach in Rio De Janeiro).

But why am I talking about leathery skinned old men that look like an old baseball catcher's mitt when we are here to critique a burger?

The burger at NSHRY is a cracker. The patty is handmade, thick, tasty and juicy for the most (the outer part of the patty was a tad dry though). A bit like Mick Malthouse - his tough/dry exterior sets the tone as a hardened football veteran with a mural of himself in his living room. But whenever I see his daughter Christi conduct an interview with him I can't help but think there is a softer side to him.

The bun was soft and kept the burger intact (a slightly crispy outer shell but it didn't rub against the outer lips so you didn't leave looking like you had just poorly washed clown make-up off your face). Some burger management was required but if you don't mind having your fingers smell like burger for the rest of the day then you won't have any trouble.

The chips were seriously good. They were plentiful, crunchy on the outside and soft on the inside and came served with three different types of sauces (tomato, aioli and a spicy sauce).

I also loved that this burger came with grilled mushroom which added a silkiness to burger. A rare event for Burger Friday.

I am a firm believer in the fact that you do not make friends with salad, but the coleslaw and cornichons on the side added a nice freshness to the proceedings.

But the thing that really impressed me about this burger was the delicate little Parmesan crisp that topped the burger. I imagine that this was produced by sprinkling some Parmesan into an egg ring on a hot plate and allowing it to melt, letting it harden, and then scraping it off. However they made it, it gave the burger that little bit of crunch which is normally provided by bacon. It really did compliment the burger like Glenn McGrath's tight line and length complimented Shane Warne's fiercely spun leg breaks.

My biggest gripe was the service - well over half an hour for service.

As yesterday was Valentine's Day, I will be comparing this burger to a couple. The great couples that spring to mind are ones like the Woodies, Jo Montana and Jerry Rice, Hayden and Langer, Tiger Woods and Steve Williams (who is still New Zealand's highest paid sportsmen despite now being on the bag of a man who is allergic to winning). These are people who all worked together in unison to achieve the ultimate goal.

But the couple I would most like to compare this burger to is that of duel NBA Hall-of-Famers John Stockton and Karl Malone. "The Mailman" Malone was the beef and brawn in the middle. Whereas "The pre-pubescent boy next door" Stockton was the class and the unselfishness on the side. Similarly, the NSHRY burger was the thick and flavorsome star of the show, aptly supported by the chips and other sidekicks that worked their backside off to make the burger better.

I recommend the food but only if you have the time to wait a while.

Burger Friday Rating: 40.17/50